Ok so what started out as a routine doctor’s appointment ended up with the doctor leaving me questioning all my parenting skills and pretty much my life in general!! It went a little something like this…
Doc (looking at Roxy): “Ooh, how old is He?”
Me: “SHE is just over 7 months”
Seriously, what more do I have to do? I dress her in pink, in pretty girly clothes and still everyone thinks she’s a boy! Strike one to the doctor!
Doc: “Oh he’s a bit chunky for 7 months”
Great, I’ve been doing my best to fatten Roxy up as she’s always been below average on all the weight charts and too small for all her clothes but now you’re telling me she’s too fat!?!? Strike two!
Doc: “well is he reaching all the milestones?”
SHE, SHE, SHE!!!!! I don’t know, you tell me. What on earth is a milestone for a baby and how would I know if she’s reached it?!?!? Strike three!
Doc (before even giving me a chance to respond to the milestones question): “he must look like his Dad because he doesn’t even look a bit like you”!!!
Perfect, I only carried her for 9 months, went through the excrutiatng ordeal of childbirth and looked after her every day for the past 7 months but now she looks nothing like me! Already feeling a little sensitive in this area as all she can say from morning until night on a continuous loop is “Da-da, Da-da, Da-da”!!! So, strike four to you, Doc!
It gets better….
Doc: “So you’re not pregnant with your second yet then?”
Should I be? Hadn’t really thought about it yet, but is this some back hand way of him telling me my biological clock is ticking or something? Strike five!
Me: “Well no, still hoping to get a little more sleep with this one before I think about another”
Doc: “Oh no, you won’t get a rest now until your youngest child is 25”
I’ll look forward to that then, thanks. Strike six!
Doc: “have you gone back to work?”
Me: “not really yet, taken the odd client here and there when I can”
Doc: “well you need to work really, you need to do something else otherwise it can be pretty wearing just being a mum” ouch, strike seven!
So there we go, seven blows to my confidence in about seven minutes! Well done doc, could be some kind of record! I’m off home now to question my very existence….